Friday, January 30, 2009
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Just Because It Waddles Like A Duck Doesn't Make It A Car
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
DIY Food Fun Day
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Eight Is Really Enough
Monday, January 26, 2009
Senator Oprah?
Friday, January 23, 2009
Wow! Their Names Are Really Sasha and Malia?
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Does This Airplane Seat Make My Butt Look Big?
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Take Me To Your Udder Leader
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
At Least They Don't Come With Peanut Butter Salmonella Dressing
Friday, January 16, 2009
When You're Handed Lemons, Make A News Flash Out Of It
Thursday, January 15, 2009
I Am Mr. Roarke, Your Host. Welcome to Heaven.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Is That A Gummi Eyeball Or Are You Just Nuts?
Ricardo Jaral, Mexico City's director for conservation of public spaces, has declared war on chewing gum, which he says covers the city's sidewalks to the tune of 70 BPSY (blobs per square yard). "When you finish chewing a piece of gum, you either have to put it in a piece of paper and deposit it in a trash receptacle, or swallow it," he said. Meanwhile in Texas, death row inmate Andre Thomas pulled out his only good eye and told authorities he ate it. No word on whether he thought he was in Mexico and was being a good citizen.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
This Site Stinks
Monday, January 12, 2009
Doggone Day Afternoon
Friday, January 09, 2009
A Personal Auto Bailout
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Pimpin' Barack's Ride
As has become a tradition, Barack Obama will ride in a brand new limo during the inaugural parade next week. Spy photos of the limo show a huge, tank-like custom-built Cadillac with 8-inch-thick doors, thick ballistic glass windows, phones, satellite hook-up, Internet access, and a hand-cut-and-sewn interior. Black, of course. And yes, it's a hybrid that reportedly runs on diesel fuel—not E85, biodiesel, hydrogen, dilithium crystals, or even electricity. No word on whether it will be outfitted with 22" DUB Dirty Dog-5 chrome spinners or 27" Lexani Seven EFTs.
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
If Someone Answers, Hang Up
Monday, January 05, 2009
If It Walks Like A School And Quacks Like A School...
The Watercliffe Meadow elementary, uh, place where kids go all day to learn stuff, in Sheffield, England, doesn't call itself a "school" because administrators say many parents have a negative connotation of school. Linda Kingdon, Chief Person Who Educates Children, prefers to call it "a place for learning," one which also features no bells or locked doors, and in which children will be encouraged to wear soft shoes so they'll be comfortable. Once children graduate from Watercliffe Meadow they'll be able to continue their education at Politically Correct Junior High, Euphemism Prep, or Muddy Meaning Middle, uh, Place for Learning.